29 January 2008

The cruelest of ironies

I have a friend that I have known since I was about 17. She came to the US in search of a new life, a husband, and to teach. She is the sweetest thing. As the years went by she established herself here and began teaching.

But the years went by. No husband. No family. As she got older she took the opportunity to help and assist others providing the loving care she would have given to a family to her friends. She is well loved by most who meet her. Way into her fifties, a man who had recently become widowed fell in love with her. They quickly married and she was finally living the life of her dreams. He showered her with love and affection and her life became that of fairy tales. You see, he is a prince, and her desire was his will to fulfill. She still did not have children, but that would be okay. She knew he loved her and that was good. She was happy.

He is now very aged. And in the next few weeks he will probably pass away. She is saddened at the thought of this loss, but realizes his has been a life well spent. A business man respected in his community. A philanthropist helping everyone in need. A well loved uncle with a large extended family. His has been a good life and it is time to pass on. She accepts that and will mourn his passing with fond memories knowing he gave her his everything.

Enter the cruelest of ironies. This past week my friend was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. That which she yearned for children, never coming to her, then acceptance. Now that which would provide life betrays and will seek to take hers. She is in for the fight of her life. Losing her only love and now possibly her own life. She is having surgery tomorrow. She won't be sure of her prognosis until after the surgery. But she goes in worried. Who will be there for her loving husband? Will he pass away while she's in the hospital? Will she survive to be there for him in his final hours? Ugh. She says her timing has always been off. I can understand how she could see her life that way.

I will be spending a few nights with her dying husband while she is in the hospital. He is not aware of his surroundings, not in a coma, but still not here. She has asked that I come and be with him so she can be at the hospital and know all is well at home. I told her I'd be honored. It's the least I can do for her.

So blogging, which I though would pick up this week, will actually stall once again. Check back in a couple of days I'll be back.